After traveling a distance of more than 50 km on my way to meeting a senior leader from a highly reputed MNC, all my calls and messages for getting a formal confirmation - not mandatory though - remained unanswered.
Helpless, I sent him a desperate message and to my surprise an immediate reply flashed on the screen of my cellphone -- but, indicating his unavailability for the proposed meeting!
Well, before I analyze this issue further, pl go through the messages exchanged between us:
Me: "Hi, as discussed can I come in the 2nd half - - may be between 3-5 pm." Received no Reply from him,
An hour later, I sent another sms: "Hi, regarding our proposed meeting today, can we meet at around 5 PM." Still No reply.
Finally, out of frustration, I wrote: "Actually, I've stopped the car and waiting for your confirmation. Do let me know even if the meeting is canceled."
Fortunately, this hit the bull's eye and came much-awaited reply: "Sorry let's refix pl."
And, I concluded, painfully, with a final message to him, "Trust me, I'd rather appreciate a frank 'No' from you if it's difficult at this point, than keeping a hope alive for no reasons. Its fine, no issue at all."
Although, an extra-precaution, perhaps saved me from an impending humiliation but this incident exposed the dark shade of our leadership: The act silence, with least concern for people within their area of influence.
There's nothing wrong in canceling an appointment but what matters is, how you go about it.
Looking little deeper into the whole episode, what surprises me is: Despite demonstrating a complete lack of empathy, a personality trait that's key to success in relationship management, he's heading a critical function - in a global organization - with the responsibility of training thousands of employees on something that he himself has no idea about: Emotional Intelligence!
Okay, if you're already a leader or aspiring to be one, always remember:
1. Every relationship is worth 'a yes or no,' Never let it hang in-between reflecting your indecisiveness.
2. Never kill the dignity in you. convey your message humanely even if you're not interested in a particular relationship.
3. Silence is killing. Always spell out clearly what you have in mind, may be diplomatically, but never resort to the act silence as a problem solving tool.
Because, silence, when turns into a habit, makes you immune to human emotions -- marking the beginning of a downfall, in every walks of life, sooner or later.
Remember, effective leadership, be it in professional or in personal space, is always a function of your communication quality - not necessarily in terms of external demonstration but the message within - but never, of your ability to maintain a silence.
Now that I've shared a painful experience with you, please let me know, do you too consider the act of Silence as a deadly Leadership Sin?
Cross-posted from my Leadership blog
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